First Date 101

Human interaction is hard enough before you even approach the first date; so in my efforts to further the growth of humanity I have created a hodge-podge of helpful tips. Now instead of stressing about how to behave, this article is going to take some of the pressure off of you before the big night.

  • When dressing for the first date, try not to take it over the top.  Wear something you would normally wear, it’s important that you be comfortable.  If you put on your shortest party dress your five inch heels and paint on a new face, and this is not your normal style; odds are that you will be conscious of this the whole date and won’t be able to really let go of the superficial nervousness that already comes with the first date.  Be you, and be comfortable. That is what is most important.
  • When on a first date don’t steer the conversation in too serious of a direction such as past relationships, bad mouthing your ex, where you want this current relationship to go, etc. because a first date is far too soon for such a discussion
  • DO NOT GET DRUNK! That sends a completely wrong impression if you are looking for something serious/long term.  There should be a two drink maximum for the first date and if you are a light weight you might want to refrain from alcohol all together
    • On a side note don’t brag about how much alcohol you can chug because it’s not very lady like, it could paint you in some colors that you may not want to be seen in
  • Make sure you pick a place where you can actually engage in conversation, especially if this is just someone you met while out and about and you have no friends or places in common. Try a coffee shop not necessarily a giant national chain but somewhere cozy and intimate.  That way if the convo isn’t interesting it’s ok to keep it short, and if it is then that is all the better.
  • The big question. Who picks up the check? Well there are several different ways this can pan out. If you want to offer to pay half than do so, there is nothing wrong with that. If you feel as if he should pay and he doesn’t then that should answer any questions in your mind about a second date. It’s all about what you are comfortable with.  In these days and times there is no longer a stock answer to this question.  If you want a man that pays, date a man that pays.  If you want to split everything 50/50 then go ahead and do so.  There is nothing wrong with you being independent and there is nothing wrong with chivalry either.
  • The real secret to a successful first date is knowing what it is that you truly want and what you are comfortable with.  If you do not want to kiss on the first date then don’t.  Don’t be concerned about what he wants because if he is truly interested in getting to know you he won’t care if he kisses you.  If you are just looking to be wined, dined, then sexed.  Then know that and be ok with what road that may take you down.  The key to a successful dating life is knowing who you are, your, wants, and desires.  Once you’ve got that all nailed down, the rest will start to fall into place

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